This article was written many years ago, but it applies to the experience that realatives and friends of transsexuals have when they lose their loved one to the transsexual culture.

It also applies to the transsexuals themselves.  If a transsexual sees him or herself as a "victim" of their family or wrong gender their life and attitude will take on these same characteristics.

The characteristics of those who choose to live life as a victim, and those suffering from chronic illness, cancer, AIDS, overweight, depression, alcoholism, drug addiction, dysfunctional relationships,and poverty are basically the same.          

DEPRESSION

LOW SELF-ESTEEM

INSECURE

TELL STORIES, PLACE BLAME, MAKE EXCUSES

SOCIALLY PLEASANT

NON-COMPETITIVE

COOPERATIVE

GOOD PATIENTS

EAGER TO PLEASE

SELF SACRIFICING

OVERANXIOUS

SENSITIVE

PASSIVE

APOLOGETIC

SELF-CRITICAL

EMOTIONAL RIGIDITY

SUPPRESSED ANGER

COMPLIANT IN ORDER TO HELP OTHERS

HELPLESS AND/OR HOPELESS IN ANY LIFE CHALLENGING EVENT

APPEARS TO BE IN CONTROL AND HAPPY, BUT INTERNALLY IS THE OPPOSITE

All of these characteristics can be summed up in one word. 

VICTIM

Many of the following common factors are found in the lives of  individuals who believe they are a victim.

BLEAK AND EMOTIONLESS OUTER LIVES

LIVES ARE ALOOF AND/OR COLD

SUPPRESS THEIR EMOTIONS

BLEAK INNER LIVES

LONELY, ISOLATED CHILDHOOD

STIFF UPPER LIP, WITH NO COMPLAINING

TENSE, STERILE, EMOTIONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH ONE OR BOTH PARENTS

EVEN AS A CHILD, FELT THAT A DEEP PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WAS NOT POSSIBLE

FOCUSES ON A CAUSE, JOB, OR ANOTHER PERSON

LOSES THE JOB, CAUSE, OR PERSON AND BECOMES DEPRESSED

FELT THAT THE CAUSE, JOB, OR PERSON WAS INDISPENSIBLE AND/OR IRREPLACEABLE

GIVING-UP COMPLEX; FEELS BEATEN AND SEES NO WAY TO BOUNCE BACK FEELS

THERE IS NO HOPE FOR POSITIVE IMPROVEMENT

ACCEPTS THEIR LOT IN LIFE WITHOUT COMPLAINT

FEELS THEY ARE BEING JUDGED OR PUNISHED

JUDGMENTAL OF OTHERS, ALWAYS EXPECT THE WORST FROM OTHERS

INSISTS ON THINGS BEING EITHER RIGHT OR WRONG

SEES DANGER EVERYWHERE

LIVES WITH SIN AND GUILT AS MAJOR PARTS OF THEIR LIVES

WATCHES, LISTENS TO, READS NEWS, FOCUSES ON THE TERRIBLE THINGS THAT HAPPEN EACH DAY

BELIEVES EVERYONE ELSE IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR PAIN

FREQUENTLY ILL, EVEN IN CHILDHOOD

HAS SERIOUS AND/OR FREQUENT ACCIDENTS AND SURGERIES

The result of living in a victim attitude and lifestyle can be belief that one is living in the wrong gender body, the suppression and overwork of the immune system, illness, weight gain, inability to effectively lose weight, body weakness, tired feelings, need to sleep, suicidal, lack of enthusiasm, a "dead" appearance and attitude, depression, fear, addictions, psychiatric care, the inability to make and maintain healthy relationships, adoption of a they (________) fill in the blank, are at fault" attitude.

Many weight loss, health improvement, psychiatric programs, addiction recovery programs, and counseling services exist today, each claiming to have the right way to gain health and mental balance or lose weight.  However, most practice behavior modification and/or drug treatment.  These treatments are similar to putting a bandaid on a broken arm, you have treated the symptom, but the cause still exists.  Until the root cause of underlying problems is addressed and cleaned up no long term results can be expected since the original problem (beliefs) still exist in the subconscious and are running the show.  The results will be continued dysfunctional beliefs and relationships, yo-yo weight loss, chronic illness, self mutilation through gender reassignment surgery, continued physical damage from "accidents", terminal illness, long term psychiatric care, drug recovery treatment and/or hospitalization.   The medical profession is increasingly understanding that the WHOLE person must be treated, not just one aspect of the person.  A doctor can treat a physical complaint or problem and still lose the patient because his/her emotional and spiritual states are out

of order. 

Many doctors, psychiatrists, and drug and alcohol counselors have come forth recently and publicly written or stated that when the patient accepts full accountability and responsibility for their thoughts creating their illness or life condition, then the patient can accept and put into action full accountability and responsibility for their recovery.  When this happens the patient can experience full recovery and no further relapse or reoccurrence of the problem, unless the patient lapses into their old ways of thinking. 

From this point of view, many have successfully overcome their belief system and remained in their birth gender, millions recover from cancer, leukemia, MS and other chronic illness, end drug and alcohol addictions, many have recovered from the effects of AIDS and are living well, and many more begin to experience the joy of working relationships.